Dear Abby: Now that I am sober, my supportive friend wants me to marry him

DEAR ABBY: I am 58 and a recovering addict. I used drugs and alcohol for 30-plus years, and now I have 20 months clean, thank God. Throughout my addiction, I had a friend who was my strong supporter. I always regarded him as a friend, since he was there when I was actively addicted.

Now that I'm clean, he wants to step it up and go from friends to a relationship. Yes, I care for him, but he wants to get married without first getting to know the real me. He's a hard worker who doesn't drink or smoke. He just works and comes home. He's just the type of man I've been looking for. Please advise me on what I should do. -

Your statement that this man wants to get married without first getting to know the real (I assume you mean sober) you speaks volumes to me. It tells me you are making mature, well-thought-out judgments, for which I congratulate you. He may be just the type you are looking for, but postpone marriage until you are certain that he knows and can accept the new strong and sober you.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.