Military service teaches us lessons about humility, inclusivity and respect
John Ripley is a former journalist, former aide to U.S. Rep. John Baldacci and Gov. Angus S. King, and retired U.S. Navy public affairs officer. He lives in South Portland.
In 2016, I was meekly sitting in the far corner of a cramped office, having just reported for duty as the public affairs officer for SEAL Team 18, a reserve unit in Virginia Beach, Virginia. These hardened warriors were going on and on about Donald Trump, so I interjected: "Is this a good time to show you guys my Bernie Sanders tattoo?" "Not at all," one SEAL replied. "Let me just close the door."
And then we all laughed.
Fast forward to earlier this fall when I had dinner with some dear Navy veteran friends — all decorated, all successful in our professional and military lives. Among the four, we had something like six war deployments, including one as a combat pilot in Vietnam. This past Election Day, I'm sure that two of us canceled out the presidential votes of the other two. But I'm also confident that either camp would, without hesitation, give their lives for the others.
On this Veterans Day, as the country blows off the steam from a historically temperamental presidential election, it reminds me how, in many ways, the U.S. military can provide guidance in cohabitation to the other 94 percent of the American public who never served in uniform.
According to a 2023 Pew Research Center white paper , although the percentage of Americans who served in the military has shrunk since 1980, the demographics of our veterans will become more diverse over the next generation. In the years to come, more women and non-whites will have the honor and burden of being an American veteran.
During my 20 years as a Navy reservist, I was blessed to travel the world: Hawaii, Boston, Afghanistan, the UK, Egypt, the Caribbean and so forth. I sailed on ships of multiple classes, hitched rides on cargo planes and helicopters, rode a desk, applauded a commander in chief during a speech in our nation's Capital. I served several times on active duty, where there was no line between our reserve and active forces.
And I never once, even when I entrusted my life to their capability, questioned the race, creed or political beliefs of a colleague.
Through it all, there were a few guiding principles that governed military life; these lessons I've retained as a civilian:
It's not about you. Your North Star is the U.S. Constitution and the safety of the homeland. Secondarily, your focus is the health and welfare of those under your direction. Leadership really is nothing more than putting others first.
Respect the rank. I'll never argue that the military is perfect as a social experiment — we have way too many suicides and sexual assaults — but the structure forces those in uniform to live and work together, if not in peace then at least in understanding and mutual abeyance to the system.
Commonality. Anyone who has traveled understands that people have more in common than not. Veterans perhaps appreciate this more than most because of the nature of the business. My wife and I just took a trip to Italy, my first as a civilian. The country recently elected a right-wing leader, but not once — not once — did politics come up in a conversation with locals. We talked only about family and food.
There's a wonderful old photograph of aged Civil War veterans from the North and South shaking hands across a shrub. Even as a born Southerner I feel the Confederacy was treasonous; and yet here are these timeworn fellows, the blue and the gray, seeking refuge and consensus, and at least briefly enjoying their status as Americans united.
You don't have to be a veteran to serve. Teachers, volunteers and first-responders all give back quietly, regardless of political stripe.
On this Veterans Day, I implore you to not just blindly thank a veteran for their service but to take a breath and listen to their story; it'll be one of inclusivity, bravado, humility and understanding that the fabric of America is woven by those who can disagree with, respect and love.