How 49ers’ Nick Bosa handles stress of being defined by a stat: ‘It’s a constant battle’

Nick Bosa has job stress. A lot of it.

The San Francisco 49ers ' generational pass rusher has coped by becoming a voracious reader and dabbling in meditation. He has visited with the team's psychologist, stayed off social media and focused on relationships, with his parents and older brother, that ground him.

Kickoff:

Spotlight on WR Brandon Aiyuk: After a sluggish start following his offseason contract impasse, the 49ers need Aiyuk to find the form that earned him his four-year, $120 million extension. Aiyuk, who has six catches for 71 yards in two games, likely will be the 49ers' only All-Pro offensive playmaker on the field. TE George Kittle (hamstring) is doubtful and RB Christian McCaffrey (calf, Achilles) and WR Deebo Samuel (calf) are out. QB Brock Purdy's other primary options likely will include WRs Jauan Jennings and Jacob Cowing and TE Eric Saubert.

Injury notes: 49ers — DE Nick Bosa (rib) and CB Charvarius Ward (knee, hamstring) are questionable. Rams — WR Cooper Kupp (ankle) is out; CB Cobie Durant (toe) and K Joshua Karty (groin) are questionable.

• The Rams are ranked 30th in rushing yards allowed per game (197) and yards allowed per carry (5.5). • Jordan Mason can become the seventh RB in NFL history to have 100-plus rushing yards and a TD in each of the first three games to start a season. • The 49ers are ranked 19th in third-down conversion rate (34.8%) after ranking fourth (47.5%) in 2023.

This week, as Bosa was detailing the emotional toll of his first five years in the NFL, he agreed that last season was the most taxing. But then he reconsidered: The 2021 season was another mental meat grinder. And 2020, when two torn knee ligaments created endless anguish and uncertainty, was "the worst ... just awful."

Entering Sunday's meeting against the Rams, Bosa knows the outside perception doesn't match his inner angst. He is arguably his high-performing company's most valuable employee, and he's unquestionably its top earner. It's why the NFL's 2022 Defensive Player of the Year with a $170 million contract laughed Wednesday when, near the end of a revealing discussion about stress and pressure, he was sarcastically told that his job sounds like a lot of fun.

"Yeah," Bosa said, smiling, "it's not like you get to really enjoy being a millionaire 26-year-old all the time. But I'm not complaining at all. I take it all because you learn from all that adversity. It's worth it."

Bosa provided the inspiration for this story nearly two weeks ago during a brief one-on-one chat at his locker. The topic was Bosa's teammate, fellow pass rusher Leonard Floyd, and it was mentioned that Floyd was so obsessed with sacks that he prayed during the week, about non-football matters, to get his mind off his job.

It was presented as an amusing quirk, but Bosa didn't smile. He explained that he related.

"As a pass rusher — one stat kind of defines you," Bosa said. "And it's tough. It's stressful. Especially when you're paid a lot. And every week, it weighs on you if you're not getting sacks. I think it's a constant battle — like you were saying with Leonard — to take your mind off it."

Bosa's answer led to more questions. And he agreed to explore the topic in greater depth with the Chronicle on Wednesday.

Despite a career that's on a Hall of Fame trajectory, the highest-paid defensive player in NFL history has adopted techniques to avoid stress-induced spiraling.

Bosa is an avid reader with varied interests, ranging from historical fiction to science fiction to self-help, and it often generates ideas for the day-before-game speeches he delivers to the team each week. However, reading also can temporarily free him from football thoughts, or provide valuable perspective on his job.

He's currently reading "Ego Is the Enemy," which, as the title suggests, deals with the value of humility and includes lessons from ancient stoics.

"It's kind of how you react to negatives and positives in life," Bosa said. "Getting too comfortable and complacent and patting myself on the back too much when things go good and vice versa. When things go bad, just getting back to the process. Not dwelling on the past or the future. It's all just helpful stuff for our profession, I'd say."

Bosa was the No. 2 pick in the 2019 draft who became the NFL's Defensive Rookie of the Year and reached the Super Bowl before he experienced career turbulence, suffering a knee injury in Week 2 of the 2020 season that required an ACL reconstruction.

In 2021, he went straight into training camp after rehabbing all offseason and was "stressed out" about taking the COVID vaccine during the NFL's final season with pandemic restrictions. Last season, he signed his five-year, $170 million contract extension after a holdout that ended three days before the regular-season opener and dealt with early-season struggles after missing training camp.

After he had an NFL-high 18.5 sacks in 2022, Bosa had just 2.5 sacks after seven games and finished with 10.5. He heard the whispers: The 49ers were paying all that money for this.

Bosa, who joked that he wishes he could get sacks all the time to "shut people up," was affected.

"Yeah, that's definitely part of it," Bosa said. "Last year was tough mentally. The beginning, yeah, but also throughout the whole year. I didn't have (training camp). I wasn't as polished as I wanted to be. I wasn't playing as good as I wanted to. And you're in the season, so it's hard to really catch up. And then you have all the pressure."

Last year, Bosa shared his struggles with All-Pro running back Christian McCaffrey, who could relate. McCaffrey signed an extension with the Panthers in 2020, becoming the NFL's highest-paid running back, and then played just three games that season because of injuries.

Bosa also had an appointment with Joe Mattox, the team psychologist with whom he also visited in 2021. Those discussions have included how to handle job stress, pressure that comes, in part, from striving to maintain the standard Bosa has set.

This offseason, before his sixth year in the NFL, when he can become one of three players since 1982 to have 15-plus sacks in three of his first six seasons, Bosa's stay-great plan involved varying his pass-rush repertoire.

"There's no complacency in this league," Bosa said, "and that's what makes it a stressful job, at least for me. And I feel it. Every guy wants to be elite. So all the elite guys in this locker room, and there's a lot of them — Trent (Williams), Christian, George (Kittle), (Javon) Hargrave, Fred (Warner) — it's stressful because it's a constant battle mentally and physically to keep yourself at the top."

However, Bosa is different from some of his elite peers. Offensive line coach Chris Foerster, a 31-year NFL veteran who has worked with Hall of Famers such as QB Peyton Manning and offensive linemen Jonathan Ogden and Randall McDaniel, said "the high-anxiety guys aren't usually the very productive players."

Williams, an All-Pro left tackle, said Bosa is his own harshest critic and often fails to appreciate how the double-teams and other attention he receives from opponents are instrumental to the 49ers' success.

"He's probably too hard on himself," Williams said. "Not 'probably.' He's way too hard on himself."

Warner, an All-Pro linebacker, understands Bosa's angst, but said he has freed himself from similar feelings.

"I do. I get it. I've been there," Warner said, "but I wouldn't say I'm stressed now by any means. I've eliminated all the nonsense that is stress-worthy."

Warner, a seven-year veteran, said becoming a father this past offseason has provided him with perspective when it comes to his job. And Williams, 36, pointed to his 2018 diagnosis with a rare form of skin cancer for doing the same.

Bosa, who is single, didn't discuss a similar life-altering moment that has changed his mindset. But he's clearly grown since he entered the NFL filled with bravado.

As a rookie, after his fourth career game, Bosa trash talked Cleveland quarterback Baker Mayfield after a blowout win over the Browns in which Bosa dropped his college rival for two sacks, one more than he had in his first three games.

"Now," Bosa declared of his breakout performance, "everyone knows this is me."

On Wednesday, Bosa struck a far different tone when asked about a dominant two-snap, second-quarter sequence in last Sunday's 23-17 loss at Minnesota, in which he beat premier left tackle Christian Darrisaw for a sack before knocking him down with a bull rush.

Bosa, who has the third most sacks in the NFL since 2021, sounded like a rotational player when he explained that the plays gave him a mental boost.

"That's something," he said, "that just builds your confidence."

In "Ego Is the Enemy," the author, Ryan Holiday, writes that readers will "be less invested in the story you tell about your own specialness" and will be freed to accomplish "world-changing work."

Bosa is still working to free himself from undue stress and pressure, but the results of his quest explain why he says it has been worth it.

He has been humbled by adversity, gained wisdom through his reading, and it's possible that in striving and sometimes struggling to maintain athletic greatness he has become, in the process, a better man.