“To have all that talent was probably the biggest curse he ever carried”: The self-loathing that haunted Eddie Van Halen throughout his life

While promoting his new book Brothers, Alex Van Halen has shed light on the difficulty his late brother Eddie had with being labelled "the greatest guitarist" . It turns out that carrying that mantle was so heavy that it took a toll on the Van Halen guitarist's self-esteem.

In the book, which is published next week, Alex writes that Eddie "ate up" the adulation he got for his talent before finding himself "overwhelmed with the burden of it". It left him with anxiety over his playing, believing he was unworthy of his own talent. It spiralled into issues with drugs and alcohol to quell the insecurity, leading Alex to voice the belief that the damage he did to his body from substance abuse brought about his death from cancer in 2020.

In an interview with Rolling Stone , Alex recalls an occasion where Eddie came to his house and threw a newly completed side project onto the kitchen table. "My wife and I were sitting there, and I'm looking at it – 'What's this shit,' right?" he says. "And he goes, 'See? Little brother can do something after all.'

"Had I been more receptive to the fact that all he wanted was approval," he continues, "I would have said, 'That is the greatest fucking thing I've ever seen.' But at the time, I was more thinking, 'Ed, what are you talking about? What more could you want? You already have the.... You are the king of the...' You know, it just didn't make sense to me. And now, when I think about it, it makes me want to cry.

"To have all that talent was probably the biggest curse he ever carried. The fact was that Ed was an incredible player, but in the end he paid for it with his health, paid for it with his life."

Brothers will hit shelves on 22 October.