With the election still looming and the holidays coming, how to deal with stress

HONOLULU (KHON2) — In the hustle of daily life, stress often sneaks up on us; and before we know it, we're feeling overwhelmed, anxious or even physically drained.

The days leading up to National Stress Awareness Day (Wednesday, Nov. 6) and the 2024 election may amplify these feelings as people juggle busy work schedules, personal commitments and the constant barrage of media, all while trying to make sense of the world around them.

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For many, it's hard to separate the stressors in their lives — personal, professional, political –from the impact they have on their mental health and wellbeing.

To help guide us through these tough times, KHON2.com sat down with Ellen Schenzer, a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist located in Honolulu. Schenzer has more than 20 years of experience and she was able to shed some light on the dynamics of stress and offers practical ways to manage it.

"Stress is a physiological and mental response to a real or perceived threat," Schenzer explained. Whether it's a near-accident or the anxiety of meeting a work deadline, the body's natural response to stress is to trigger a fight-or-flight reaction.

But not all stressors are immediately visible or obvious, especially in a fast-paced environment like Hawaii, where people juggle multiple jobs, families and significant events like the 2024 elections.

Recognizing stress in your life

For many, stress is something that gradually builds up over time. One might not even recognize the signs of stress until it's already taken a toll on their bodies and emotions.

"You can recognize that you're stressed out because your heart starts to beat fast. You might get sweaty palms, or you might not breathe at all," Schenzer said. "That happens when I meet with people a lot, like, I don't think you've taken a breath at all this session."

It's easy to forget the basics — breathing, slowing down, checking in with ourselves — when life gets hectic. Schenzer encouraged people to become more aware of their physical state.

"Busy people have busy lives and tend to run from one thing to the next. So just slowing down can be very helpful," she advised.

Taking a moment to check in with yourself, to pause and breathe, is an effective way to recalibrate. Schenzer recommended practicing this mindfulness regularly, even during busy times, whether you're driving, at work or simply waiting for an appointment.

Election stress: An added layer of anxiety

As the 2024 election looms large, Schenzer has observed that the political climate is adding another layer of stress for many of us.

With an election that is particularly contentious — marked by heated debates, misleading ads and public division — it's easy for people to get caught up in the turmoil.

"A lot of people are consuming a lot [of media] all day long, engaging with people online that have a different opinion than they do," Schenzer noted. "And you're not going to change anybody's opinion. So, it's futile to argue with people online."

The 24/7 news cycle, social media, and political discourse contribute to an environment ripe for stress.

"It's best to just limit the amount of social media and news that you're taking in, especially if you're finding yourself getting upset and really worried," Schenzer advised.

Rather than focusing on things outside of our control, such as the outcome of a heated political race, it's important to refocus on what we can control: ourselves.

Managing stress and setting boundaries

When people find themselves sinking into anxiety, Schenzer suggested we check in with our bodies.

"I would ask them to take a moment and just see where they're holding any tension and stress in their body," she said.

A critical first step in managing stress is awareness. For those who may not recognize the physical effects, Schenzer asked them questions like, "Have you been snappy toward your loved ones or people on the road?"

The goal is to help individuals understand how their internal state is affecting their actions and interactions with others.

And let's not forget the dangers of stress in anonymity — take road rage, for example.

"When you have unresolved issues in your own life and you're not managing your stress and anxiety, it's an easy place for your issues to come out," Schenzer pointed out.

The anonymity of driving can make people feel detached from their actions which can lead to explosive outbursts. In these moments, slowing down and checking your emotions before reacting is critical.

Stress is also contagious.

"Managing other people's stress," as Schenzer put it, is a huge challenge. "It's really important to be mindful of surrounding yourself with more positive people, not the people who are super stressed out that you're having to manage their stress."

Techniques for de-Sstressing

For those in need of immediate stress relief, Schenzer recommended simple but effective tools that can be used throughout the day.

Breathing exercises, for example, can be done anywhere.

"When you're sitting at your desk or driving in your car, take a moment and take a deep breath," Schenzer suggested. "You can take a breath in for three counts, hold it for three counts, and breathe out for three counts."

Even just a few deep breaths can make a noticeable difference in how your body responds to stress.

"It really calms your central nervous system," Schenzer explained.

For more significant moments of stress, Schenzer suggestsed asking yourself, "On a scale of 1 to 10, how stressed out am I? Okay, I'm an 8. Let me see what happens if I do some breathing. Now I'm a 6. Great, let's try again. Now I'm a 4."

In addition to breathing, Schenzer highlighted the importance of maintaining a healthy routine.

"It's really important to watch your caffeine intake, your alcohol intake and be mindful of what you're eating," she said. "Hydration and sleep are crucial. Stress can really affect the way we sleep."

When it comes to sleep, Schenzer advised turning off your phone at least an hour before bed.

"Your brain goes through a series of processes when you wake up. When you just go straight to your phone, you're interrupting that process," she said.

Similarly, avoiding screens and focusing on something positive like watching the sunrise can help set a calming tone for the day.

Utilizing your community

Stress management isn't something that always needs to be done alone.

"Now's a great time to lean into your faith and have other people support you," Schenzer said.

Whether it's turning to a spiritual community or surrounding yourself with positive, supportive friends and family, the power of connection can't be overstated.

"If you're a part of any spiritual community, that's a great time now to lean in," she added.

She also encouraged people to build intentional moments of pause into their routines.

For example, during work meetings or when transitioning between tasks, taking short breaks to breathe or stretch can be hugely beneficial.

"I just had a client yesterday who said, 'I go from meeting to meeting to meeting,' and I suggested she schedule her meetings at 10 minutes past the hour to give herself a little breathing room," she explained.

A mindful approach to life

While it may seem small, even the act of checking in with yourself can make a world of difference in how you cope with the stress in your life.

One technique that Schenzer recommended for cultivating a positive outlook amidst stress is practicing gratitude.

"Focus on gratitude," she said. "That improves mental health. It makes you see more and more positive things in life."

Studies have shown that gratitude can help rewire the brain and makes it easier to focus on the positive aspects of life instead of the negative.

"Instead of focusing on things you can't control—like the outcome of an election—focus on what you can control," Schenzer advised. "Be thankful for the things you do have, like your family, your home, and your health."

Focusing on gratitude allows you to reframe your experience of stress.

"Whatever we focus on, we get more of that," Schenzer added. "If we focus on negative things, we get more negative in our life. If we focus on positive, we get more positive things."

Taking control of your stress

Managing stress, especially during the pressure-filled days of an election season and as the holidays wait on the horizon, requires intentionality.

By recognizing the signs of stress, taking time for self-care and focusing on what we can control, we can better navigate the chaotic moments of life.

Schenzer's advice — whether through simple breathing exercises, a mindful pause or fostering gratitude — offers valuable tools to help us manage stress in ways that are healthier and more sustainable.

You can click to learn more about Schenzer.

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So, as we move through the busy days ahead, whether preparing for a contentious election, managing work-life balance or simply handling the demands of daily living, Schenzer's message is clear: take a deep breath, slow down and take care of yourself. It's the best way to manage stress and keep your mental health intact in these challenging times.